7 Ways to Up The Romance This Christmas Season

Insights:

7 Ways to Improve Your Romance During the Christmas Season

Often we get so caught up in the rush and stress of the Christmas season that we put our marriage on the back burner or somewhere out of sight. I promise, that does not work. We have tried it.  

What does work is finding a way to grow your marriage in this season. It is taking intentional time to be together and being grateful. It is saying “no” to some things so that you can say “yes” to each other. That builds intimacy and intimacy results in romance. 

So instead of following your path of “Christmas past,” why not see this Christmas as an opportunity to connect on a deeper level. Here are 7 ways to do that:

  1. Set aside a special date night for the two of you. Many couples make this an annual tradition. A special place and a special dinner for just the two of you.

  2. Look for opportunities to connect. I promise they are there. Nancy and I love to Christmas shop together. It is probably not the most efficient way to shop, but it is a lot more fun. 

  3. Meet up for coffee and spend time together. Maybe even do this once a week. It’s a brief timeout for your marriage.

  4. Sit in front of your Christmas tree together late at night. This is one of our favorite things to do. Sometimes we talk but often we are just there together enjoying the beauty and peace. 

  5. Make snow angels side by side. This is really fun IF you have snow in December. If not, do something fun together outdoors.

  6. Do something to help someone in need, together. There is something special about helping others and it becomes really special when we experience it together.

Thank God together for the gift of your marriage. Never take for granted what God did in bringing the two of you together. Marriage is a gift and taking time to thank the Creator of everything for your marriage in particular is a great way to frame your marriage in a very special way.

Next Steps:

  • Decide together how you will do each of the “7 ways” above this month.

2 Minute Clip

 In this week’s clip, Nancy and I share our favorite joys of the Christmas season.

Quick Hits

This Week’s Quote:   Andy Williams

Depending when you were born, the name Andy Williams may or may not be one you recognize. Yet, if you listen to Christmas music you have heard him sing. Many say he is the all time greatest interpreter of Christmas music. Two of my favorites are “O Holy Night” and “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year.” Andy was born on December 3, 1927 in Wall Lake, Iowa. As an American singer he recorded 43 albums in his career, of which 15 have been gold certified and three platinum certified. He sold more than 45 million records worldwide.

  • The important things are children, honesty, integrity and faith.

  • I never tried to sing like anybody else, fortunately I didn't sound like anybody else. It just happened.

This Week’s Trivia Question:

  • Who has won an Oscar for their role as Santa Claus?

Did You Know?  

  • Tom Hanks played six different roles in 'The Polar Express.' In addition to voicing the conductor, Hanks also played Hero Boy, Father, Hobo, Scrooge, and Santa Claus.

Something To Talk About Together:

  • If you had the attention of the world for 30 seconds, what would you say?

This Week’s Trivia Answer:

  • Edmund Gwenn won an Oscar for Best Actor in a Supporting Role as Kris Kringle in Miracle on 34th Street. The 1947 film won three awards from the Academy in all; the other two were for best writing of an original story and a screenplay.

Kim KimberlingComment
Here’s What an Awesome Marriage is NOT!

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 What an Awesome Marriage is NOT!

We all agree that an awesome marriage is something every spouse wants. There are many things that go into an awesome marriage, but there are also things that will never work in an awesome marriage.  

Here are some of the things I feel need to be tossed if a marriage is ever to reach “awesome.” 

The first thing on my list is selfishness. That may be the toughest obstacle most of us have to overcome. It certainly is for me. 

Let's define it. For me it is when I put my wants, my desires, and my needs above those of Nancy. It is when I want her world to revolve around mine. And do you know what is really hard for me to admit? There are times that I think she should. Sometimes I can buy into the thinking that she was created to serve me and that is just crazy thinking on my part. From a selfish standpoint that can sound pretty good for a while. But in reality, that does not work. It never has and it never will. A marriage can never be built on selfishness. 

I can also get a little self-righteous. I think that I have been a pretty good husband. I have had a pretty good day. I have checked off all the “things it takes to be a good husband” boxes on my checklist. Now it is her turn to serve me. I can build a pretty good case in my mind about this.  

The problem is that a healthy marriage does not work that way. A healthy marriage is not one person getting their way at the expense of the other. A healthy marriage is two people who purposely seek to serve each other each day. That brings balance to the marriage and eliminates selfishness. 

And do you know what? When both the husband and the wife purposefully serve each other, they each end up getting their needs met. Isn't that amazing?

Next Steps:

  • If your marriage is to attain “awesome” status, what needs to be tossed?

  • How can you purposely serve your spouse today?

2 Minute Clip

Just because your spouse is different, doesn’t mean they’re weird! Actually, it kind of makes sense that spouses approach sex differently…

Quick Hits

This Week’s Quote:   Taylor Swift

Taylor Alison Swift was born on December 13, 1989, in West Reading, Pennsylvania. She is named after singer-songwriter James Taylor. When Taylor was around 12 years old, computer repairman and local musician Ronnie Cremer taught her to play guitar. With over 200 million records sold globally, she is the most-streamed woman on Spotify and Apple Music, the highest-grossing female performer ever, and the first billionaire with music as the main source of income. 

  • No matter what happens in life, be good to people. Being good to people is a wonderful legacy to leave behind.

  • If you're yelling you're the one who's lost control of the conversation.

This Week’s Trivia Question:

  • The ancient Romans boiled vinegar and what else together to make their version of an energy drink?

Did You Know?  

  • You may have heard how a lot of the Victorians’ favorite cosmetics contained arsenic, but it gets worse. There were also products on the market in the late 19th century, like Dr. James P. Campbell’s Safe Arsenic Complexion Wafers, that were meant to be eaten. They claimed to get rid of freckles, blackheads, and other “facial disfigurements.”

Something To Talk About Together:

  • The hit TV show Friends is usually credited with inventing the holiday Friendsgiving. If you could make up a holiday, what would it celebrate?

This Week’s Trivia Answer:

  • Goat poop! (I know - that’s gross!)

Kim KimberlingComment
Imagine…

Insights:

Imagine….

One of the songs that causes me to think every time I hear it is John Lennon’s “Imagine.” When I hear it, I think about all the things John Lennon sang about in the song. Things like peace and brotherhood, which I like. Things like no heaven or no religion, which I don’t like.

I don’t agree with everything he says in the song but it has always made me think and I love the way it sounds.

From day one of Awesome Marriage, I have imagined a world free of divorce and full of awesome marriages. As Awesome Marriage enters its 13th year, let's imagine what that might look like:

  • Couples that have learned to resolve differences in a healthy way

  • Couples that work  together for a healthy family

  • No pornography

  • No affairs

  • No lies

  • No deceit

  • Couples cherishing the time they have together

  • Couples living unselfishly each day.

  • Marriages with Christ at the center.

  • Couples that regularly pray together.

  • Couples that regularly read the Bible together.

The list could go on and on, but I think you get my idea. The way that will happen is one marriage at a time and it starts with yours and mine. It starts with the marriage you have today or, if you’re not married yet, the one you will be in someday in the future. 

What if each of us, with God’s help, did our part to build an Awesome Marriage? What if other couples saw what you and your spouse were building and wanted to build their own Awesome Marriage? Then what if that was repeated over and over and over? Can you imagine what that world would look like?

Next Steps:

  • Together make a list of what your awesome marriage would look like.

  • Decide what each of you will do as your part in making that happen.

  • Invite God into your process.

2 Minute Clip

Nancy and I share a few simple ways we prioritize God and our marriage during the holidays.

Quick Hits

This Week’s Quote:   Robert Louis Stevenson

Stevenson was born on November 13, 1850 and was an only child. He was a Scottish novelist, essayist, poet and travel writer. He is best known for works such as Treasure Island, Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde, Kidnapped and A Child's Garden of Verses. In 2018, he was ranked, just behind Charles Dickens, as the 26th-most-translated author in the world.

  • Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant.

  • Compromise is the best and cheapest lawyer.

  • Compromise is the best and cheapest lawyer.

This Week’s Trivia Question:

  • What does a funambulist walk on?

Did You Know?  

  • Santa Claus was given an official pilot's license in 1927  from the Assistant Secretary of Commerce for Aeronautics William P. MacCracken.  According to the Library of Congress, "The old saint called at the Commerce Department in Washington" and when he arrived, his picture was taken as he was given his license, airway maps, "and the assurance that the lights would be burning on the airways on Christmas Eve."

Something To Talk About Together:

  • What advice would you give to your 18-year-old self?

This Week’s Trivia Answer:

  • A funambulist walks on a tightrope!

Kim KimberlingComment